January 25, 2021

In some ways, this activity is seemingly straightforward and yet it holds depths perhaps not apparent at first glance. Here, we are asked to contemplate, caṇḍī, translated as “the fierce one” or “the passionate Goddess.”

Caṇḍī is depicted as a very fierce goddess with vermilion skin and 18 arms carrying all the varieties of weapons. Her weapons are the items needed to destroy our sense of limitation and she is related to Kālī in intensity.

The spiritual path is not for the faint of heart ... and if we knew that when we started, we might not continue. In other words, we might not start if we knew what would be asked of us. The unfolding of the Truth is allowed only by the destruction of the things which are not true. These untruths, however, are often what we use to define who and what we are. They are what we cling to and what tether us to the life that we have. To give these up requires a total passion and the courage that being fearsome entails. We are asked to be fierce and passionate in the process of knowing the Truth. To ruthlessly cut away all that is untrue and all that is not eternal. Perhaps in some ways, this aspect of the One is speaking to the depths of courage that we must draw on to walk through the fires of transformation that are the core of the spiritual process. We have been contemplating Kālī as the black one and the devourer of time. Following along with this, fierceness and passion are necessary to dive into the space of nothingness, timeless and to allow the self of these identities to be devoured. As we dedicate ourselves to the truth, the innate timeliness in our core becomes real and anchors us to the wonder of the body, this life and beyond. Passionate dedication, especially in the face of this challenging and provocative process, is absolutely necessary.

Fierceness is also required as we live out our truth. In its definition, fierceness has a undercurrent of violence to it, evoking the wild, menacing energy of the warrior. This violence is what we draw on to destroy the limitations placed on us from birth onward. Our innate core desires are not necessarily what our parents wish for us, what society tells us is appropriate for our age, stage, culture, gender and so to live the radically unconventional life that we are destined to live requires courage. This life may not look that different from the outside but it is different on the inside because we are no longer bound by the limitations of the social - cultural programming, the “should’s” that have tamed us. Our zeal has been trained out of us and Caṇḍī is inviting us to throw those restraints and dive into our depths of passion. On the inside, we are engaging in the radical choice to follow our desire. Passion is what we are asked to honour, defend and follow, regardless of social construction. This leads to greater aliveness and radiance.

Consequently, we may find we need passion and fierceness to protect the tender heart that expresses its deepest desires. Bringing all aspects of ourselves fully into expression requires courage and strength. Caṇḍī references a whole collection of Goddesses who, without consort, invite us to explore the pushed aside and restrained parts of ourselves. We may find it is quite exhilarating to know that there is a Goddess who invites this intensity, and offers permission to have all our feelings, to explore the darker aspects of ourselves and to know that there is nothing off-limit here.

Violence also is inherent in life and Caṇḍī’s fieriness recognizes this. She is the act of violence underlying killing a fly and feeling the consequence of that act. She invites us to explore the underlying motive in our actions and to ultimately use violence only in service of universal truth and for the benefit of all beings. This is within the context of dissolving the inherited and inherent constraints that bind our aliveness and interfere with following our passion, unclouded by judgement, assumption and expectation.

Ultimately, Caṇḍī is the fire of initiation. She asks for the untamed behaviour to test the applicants who wish to become her devotee. If we are able to stand our ground in the face of her intensity, then we find the kindest of mothers.